My heart might actually burst...

Sitting in the back seat of my car with my sleeping baby on our way back from grandmas house. The weekend was full of lots of squeals and giggles. As I look back I smile knowing that she is loved so very very much and all of these moments she will never remember, but they are the building blocks of her character and the future little adult she will grow to become.

She is so easy going. Even when I'm about to jump out of my skin in fear that something is going to upset her or wake her from a much needed nap, she prevails. I'm in awe of the little well rounded, grounded, almost mature little thing that she is. She's still very much a baby and let's us know when she's had enough, but trouble she is not. She's not unnecessarily fussy. Not cry-y. She is curious, with a giggle about to break from the corners of every smile.

It never occurs to me how well things really are going until someone points it out. Today, before leaving town, we were having lunch at an exceptionally loud restaurant. That sent me into an anxiety spiral, worrying that it was too much stimulation for her. Then as I sit playing with her my SIL boyfriend says, "it's crazy how she never really cries." And that's when it hit me! Of course she never really cries! She's attached! She has everything she needs. We listen to her. She's perfect!

I'm definitely far from perfect and have a lot of work to do so that she never gets put in a situation where she thinks that she has to "save mommy." I have read a lot of books and seen a lot of movies based around that premise exactly. I'm not trying to redefine bipolar. Just manage it. Hell! Maybe I am trying to redefine it! Show the world that we too can raise stable well rounded bambinos!